Wow…sunshine is certainly a perfect name for my blog (of course with kittens). When first starting this blog 2 years ago Brian asked me what my favorite things are…thus sunshine and kittens was born. And sunshine is what I am currently soaking up with gusto. It is a STUNNINGLY beautiful day here and I’m currently writing this update from my back porch. I have a newly decorated table set up on our deck and a delicious smoothie fresh from my vitamix (thanks again, Gina, Julie, Carrie, Amy & Ann!!). I tend to forget how renewing sunshine actually is…it’s almost impossible to be sad or blue on a day like today.
Speaking of being blue, I’ve been feeling more strong emotionally lately. Still dealing with the middle of the night freak outs every once in a while (not helped by the ridiculously bad hot flashes I’ve had lately), but I’m trying to feel the stress and breathe through it as opposed to tamping it down. And it helps to feel physically good right now. I’ve just had a week off chemo (reminder I’m 2 weeks on, 1 week off) so that helps to give me a little perk of energy with less side affects. the only bad side affect I’m dealing with the “on” weeks is this weird swelling in my right hand and the aforementioned hot flashes. But still so far so good on this xeloda chemo.
I’m also working on being open to help from friends and family more than in the past (and not feeling as guilty when receiving it). Colleen knew I haven’t been feeling my very prettiest lately, so she and Laura treated me to eyelashes yesterday (with a lovely breakfast treat from Holly)! Pics below. And Andrea commissioned a dinner from her bestie Lacey (which was amazing) since she’s in Virginia and unable to bring dinner herself. Kim, Michelle, Kristie and Emily gave me the gift of an absolutely perfect spa weekend away (thanks for the facial, Kimmy!) and Sean is about to ride hundreds of miles in my honor to benefit caner research. Oh and my cousin Mike and his bride, Cathy, got tattoos in honor of me and my Aunt Bonnie!! Permanent tribute – wow!
We also had the complete joy of Daniel and Roger coming up from Portland for 2 nights (3 nights for Daniel!). Laughing, dancing (karaoke!), singing, cuddling – pretty much a perfect weekend. And seeing how much Desmond absolutely ADORED them was one of the highlights of my year (he was especially taken with Roger and now asks me on a daily basis where those “kids” are).
And I’m enjoying 24 hours of solo time thanks to my amazing mom-in-law who took Desmond for the night. Brian’s in Palm Springs for work, so I’m all by myself for the first time ever in our dream home. I spent the evening catching up on TV, partaking in some “herbal” remedies and staying in bed this morning until 10am. Talk about renewal of the spirit!
So today is a good day. There are bad days…but maybe a few less than last month. Stage 4 cancer can actually be a perfect reminder to grasp life and relish in the sunshine. xo
