Well crap…I did NOT want to resurrect this blog.  But unfortunately just 11 months after completing treatment, my cancer is back with a VENGEANCE (say that with a dramatic movie trailer voice).  So the start to this particular chapter began down in Tucson during my lovely sister’s wedding.  The morning of her wedding as I was reaching over the sink I felt a SEARING pain in my back – pretty much like I was struck by lightening.  For the last month I’ve suffered from a progressively worse backache that finally led me to get a MRI on Monday morning.

Let me tell you, when you get a call 15 minutes after you get home from getting a MRI asking you to come back to talk to the doctor in person, that is NOT a good sign.  Sure enough, my general practitioner delivered the news that my back pain was caused by f’ing CANCER in my backbone (my L3 vertebrae to be exact) and that the cancer had made a lovely hole in my vertebrae and caused a fracture.  So after a call from my oncologist, I went in for a CT scan on Tuesday and a bone scan on Wednesday to get a full picture of how this stupid, evil thing has manifested itself.

And today we have the full story.  My breast cancer has metastasized into my bones.  And that, my friends, is not so good.  It means that the cancer has entered my bloodstream and will just go on attacking various sundry things until scientists come up with a cure for cancer (because the alternative isn’t worth mentioning in my 2.1 blog entry).  Right now I have cancer on 5 spots – 3 vertebrae  1 rib and on my pelvis bone.  The GOOD news (the silver lining you know I love) is that it has not spread to my lungs, liver or brain which can happen with metastasized breast cancer.

So what now?  The plan of attack for the time being is 15 rounds of radiation daily to the L2, L3 and L4 vertebras.  That will alleviate the pain in my back and hopefully break down the cancer so it stops attacking that area.  The big guns come in the form of two medications I’ll get once a month (by shot – wheeee!).  The first is a bone building medication that will help strengthen my bones and reduce the pain and also reduce my risk of developing new bone metastasis.  The other is a hormone blocker that will surpress estrogen which my cancer loves like a fat kid loves cake.

Not to end this initial blog entry with a big ole bummer…but to be honest my cancer is not curable and it will not go away.  There will be no writing “I’m cancer free!” again.  But we’re going to attack this thing with every treatment option that exists as well as (and far more importantly) the love and support from all of you…my family and friends.  You know how feisty and tough I can be so I will kick this cancer’s ass and show it who’s boss.

I’ll keep ya’ll updated. In the meantime, I’m going to spoil my gorgeous kid rotten over Xmas and spend every second I can with my wonderful family.  Much love to yours…

Hi friends and family!  Well I’ve been neglecting this blog horribly.  I think this will be my final blog for the time being.  Now that I am FINISHED with treatment!!!  Such a wonderful sentence to write.  I’ll fill you in on the last few weeks…

The last 2 weeks of radiation treatment were actually pretty tough.  I developed 2nd degree burns over my chest and underarm.  It was just raw and painful.  Luckily I healed up fairly quickly after radiation ended (on 1/16/12).  Now there’s a hilarious tan square that shows the radiation area.  The last tan I’ll have there for a while (sun exposure is NOT a good thing for me anymore).

I meet with my oncologist next Friday to find out when I’ll get another scan.  But I’m fully expecting to be completely and totally cancer free.  Yeah!  I will probably go on tamoxifen for the next few years.  That’s a pill that I’ll take daily to blocks the estrogen receptor (estrogen is what my cancer fed on).  So between tamoxifen and scans every 6 months or so, I am sure I will have no reoccurrence of this damn disease.

I’m feeling pretty good these days.  Still tired unfortunately, but I know fatigue usually lasts at least 6 months after treatment ends.  I really need to start exercising on a regular basis, which will help with my overall energy and strength.  I’m taking a fun trip with Kim in a few weeks.  We’re jetting off to Iceland for 4 days!  It’s a direct flight from Seattle (just 7 hours!) and we’ll be hiking a glacier and seeing the Northern Lights.  Obviously a trip of a lifetime!

I also got an indoor skydiving gift certificate from my wonderful sis-in-law and mom-in-law.  Can’t wait to do that as well!  I’m going to fully embrace adventures and hopefully keep the perspective that the big C has given me.  Hug your family and friends often and don’t put off anything you want to do in life.  If anything, I’m glad I’ll have this blog to remind me of this journey and that very important lesson.  Thank you for joining me on this wild ride…I’m glad to step off the roller coaster for now.

All my love….Michelle (ps look I’m really starting to get hair now!)

Happy New Year friends and family! I have to say, I’m certainly ready to say adios to 2011. This has been the hardest year of my life, however in some ways it’s also been the most rewarding. I’ve expereinced a new depth of love from my closest friends, discovered amazing generosity in others, met the incredible nurses and doctors at Swedish, and most important I’ve learned a new perspective about the things that really matter in my life…most importantly my family with Brian and Desmond.

As far as where I am in treatment…I’m 24 radiation treatments in with 10 more to go. the finish line is SO close! Radiation continues to be fairly easy although in the past week or so I’ve gotten super tired and my skin is a bit irritated. But it continues to be a breeze compared to chemo, so I’m not complaining. Brian and I are going to ring in the New Year tonight with a bunch of friends and champagne while Desmond sleeps over at Grandma’s. 2012 is going to be a FANTASTIC year!!

Oh…and as promised, here are photos of my hair. It’s sloooooowly making a return appearance. I figure another month or so and I may even brave a public unveiling!

Wow…I have seriously neglected Sunshine & Kittens!  It’s hard to find time to update my dear blog now that I’m back to work full time.  But before I jump into recent updates, a quick note about the end of chemo.

I got to finally say goodbye to chemo (thanks for all your help, now get out!) on 11/11/11.  Happily right on schedule.  It was a fantastic day full of hugs from nurses, sparkling cider from the pharmacy who mixed my chemo every week, and best of all, home to a yard and front door decorated with pink flamingos (pink = breast cancer support) from my friends and notes from many of you.  Unfortunately there was a tiny grey cloud on the day once Brian and I walked in the door…we discovered our house had been broken into and the thieves had stolen my jewelry.  Damn bastards. But I quickly brushed that off and celebrated later that night with champagne and cupcakes with my besties.

Recently things have been wildly busy.  I started back to work full time on 11/28.  The same day I also started daily radiation.  Radiation has been super easy so far.  Besides the inconvenience of driving up to Swedish daily, the only other symptom has been a slight tan on my right chest.  The radiation machine is a HUGE machine that rotates around me.  I get 6 “beams” of radiation (that’s my technical term) ranging from 5 to 15 seconds each.  All in all it takes about 20 minutes.  I’ll have 34 treatments total and should be done by Jan. 16th.

It’s been wonderful being back with my Starbucks family.  I find myself so more calm and less stressed at work.  There’s nothing like the big C to put some perspective on stress.

I’ll update again before too long.  Next time I’ll include pictures of my hair – it’s actually growing back!  Love and hugs to you all.

So very happy…today is my last chemo treatment! What a relief to know that (hopefully) I will never again have to have this tough stuff pumped through my veins. Although I have to admit it’s a little bitersweet to have the comfort and routine of treatment ending. I love my nurses and doctor so much…I’ll kind of miss seeing them every week. But not enough to be far more thrilled to be DONE with this part of treatment.

Of course I still have radiation to get through. I had my planning meeting this morning which consisted of getting positioned in the radition “tube tunnel” (I’m SURE thats the technical term) and getting perfectly lined up in the machine. Then the technicians applied 4 tattoos on my chest (about the size of freckles) so that they’ll line me up the exact same every day. In the scheme of things I really feel like radiation is going to be a breeze.

Brian’s off picking up my favorite lunch (shaved noodles from shanghai garden) and tonight my girls are coming over with champagne and dessert. It’s a good day, friends and family. thank you for keeping up on this crazy journey!

Updating my blog from the new comfy chairs at swedish. Its treatment #15 today…I am DONE with chemo next week! and seriously, not a minute too soon. My poor body is really starting to show the affects of all this poison. My counts are real low today (white and red blood cells) and I’m pretty serverly anemic (which of course doesnt help with the fatigue). My finger nails are starting to die…so eventually a few may even fall off (ewwww!). Which I guess is pretty common, but still alarming for me. and lordy I am super tired lately. But after next week all these symptoms will start to go away and my strength will start to return. And I get a 2 week break before starting radiation.

I was just talking to the nurse about my hair. I know I’m a broken record, but I’m very tired of being bald. I want my hair back. I find myself staring with envy at any woman with long hair. My nurse told me that I should be rocking a cute short haircut by February latest. So there’s that…

But I really am so happy and excited that the end is in sight. And I feel lucky that I haven’t developed some of the really tough symptoms like narapathy (tingling in the hands and feet). Looking forward to a lovely weekend with my sweet boys and even a date night with Brian on Saturday at Franks Oyster House (yum!). Love to you all…

Hi friends.  My hair is starting to sloooooowly grow back, so I figured I’d share some pictures with you.  I still look like a nuclear war survivor, but at least there’s a little fuzz there!  I also got a couple of new hats to wear this winter, so I’ve included those pictures below as well.  It’s so funny, I have never wanted short hair (have had at least shoulder length hair since I was very young), but I’m going to be thrilled to have super short hair by early next year.  I can’t wait until I can put away my wigs forever!

Other than that, I’m just continuing to get a lot of rest and relaxation.  I have another physical therapy appointment this week and will start yoga this week as well. Gearing up for the last 3 treatments….chemo is almost over.  Hooray!

Hi all. It’s been a nice relaxing week. So much more energy when I can nap everyday. I’ve had some fun kitten treats lately. Michelle and Sean brought over their kitten, Apple (first pic below). And Brandon and Wouter (in Amsterdam) sent me a picture of their new kitten, Moses (2nd pic below). Don’t you think I should get a kitten when my treatment is finished?

Our suncadia trip last weekend was fantastic! We had stunning weather, delish food and great day hikes within brightly colored fall leaves. Brian got his dose of the great outdoors and Desmond had a blast running around with his Gramma. And we came home to fresh baked lasagna from Erin. Nice!

I’ll have to post a picture of my peach fuzz hair. It’s definitely starting to grow back. I actually keep having hair dreams…bad haircuts and the like. My hot flashes have been a bear lately…way more frequent. My friend Bob asked me what they’re like. I said it’s a combination of feeling like I’ve stepped into an oven coupled with a wave of anxiety. Good times. But if that’s the worst of my symptoms, big deal! Anyway, I’m getting treatment #13 now…3 more to go!

Getting treatment number 12 today. Only 4 more after today! The past week has been filled with rest and relaxation and it’s made a significant difference. I have way more energy for Desmond when he gets home from daycare. And Brian has noticed a big change in my overall health. So that’s nice. I start back on physical therapy next week and will also try yoga for the first time.

We’re going up to Suncadia Resort this weekend. Really looking forward to pool time, walks in the woods and their Harvest Festival. Nice family trip. 🙂 I’ll post pictures next week. Have a great weekend!!

Sitting here getting treatment with my warm blanket and turkey sandwich. They treat us patients well here at Swedish. I met with the radiologist this week, a wonderful doc named Astrid Morris. She has FIVE kids – two sets of twins and a 18 mo old. Made me feel exhausted just hearing about it. We made the decision that I should go through the full round of radiation – every day of the week for 6.5 weeks. I’m bummed, but not surprised. It came down to the size of the cancer in my lymph node…it was just too big to rule out that more isn’t hiding out in my lymph system. So I’ll start radiation on 11/28, 2 weeks after I finish chemo. Besides being inconvenient driving up to Swedish every day and some minor lung damage (?!) it’s not supposed to be bad at all.

I also have made the decision to take some time off work. I was really struggling with exhaustion and not having any energy for Desmond or Brian. So yesterday was my last day until Nov. 28th. It’s hard to be away from my work family and the job I love…but ultimately it’s the right choice for my health and my family. I had a great send off from my team yesterday and Amy sent me home with a big bag of homemade meals (and rice chex treats – a way more delish twist on rice crispies!).

So the next 7 weeks will be filled with yoga, naps and the occasional days where I keep Desmond home from daycare. Radiation will be done mid-Jan so I’ll celebrate my 42nd bday cancer free!!

Big shout out to Michelle R and family for the basket full of delish food and wine, and Colleen for the amazing lasagna last night. Hugs and kittens to you all!